Family

I miss my mom. I miss my whole family, but you know how sometimes you just really miss your mom? Is 25 too old to feel that way? Ok, but my mom is literally the best mom ever. And she always knows what to say, even if I don't want to hear it. And damn it, she is always right. It's to the point now where if my mom tells me something I know I really need to do what's right and just follow her advice. No more questioning, no more mulling over the problem. Her word is law.

I'm so thankful my parents repeated these phrases when my four brothers and I were growing up- "life isn't fair" and "you can do anything you want to do if you want to do it bad enough" and "do your best and if that's not good enough piss on it."

They didn't shield us from the world, instead they pushed us into it and surrounded us with great people. Life still isn't fair and that is okay because life is awesome. I've found out what it means to want something so bad that I find a way to get it, and to not want something badly enough, so I lose it- both in my personal and professional life. In a few months I'll be starting a new journey towards an old goal. And along the way I've felt as though I've failed many, many, countless times. Failing sucks. It hurts. And it hurts even more when you admit that it was something you really wanted. But that's okay. It means I'm still doing things that fuel my fire. And I'd rather fail 1,000 times than not try at all. But at 1,001 times...well shit, then I'll just piss on it (that's for you Grandpa :)

For a while I felt like I was failing everyday trying to learn and speak Spanish. Now speaking is coming more and more easily, and I understand most conversations. It's kind of true what I'd heard. One day you wake up and the language just doesn't sound and feel all that foreign anymore. It's a good feeling. Now I see people on the streets I know. I stop and have conversations with them. All in Spanish. Learning a language in a foreign country gives a new meaning to the saying "Learn something new everyday." I really feel like I am.

My parents are awesome. My dad is as just awesome as my mom. He is this very practical, straight-to-the-point kind of guy who likes basketball, beer, and barbeque. He is also wildly intelligent. I feel like I could ask him anything random and he would know the answer. He's like a walking encyclopedia. But one of my favorite things about my dad is that he has this ability to make people feel like they matter. And not in the normal way people typically do this. He doesn't hand out compliments. That's not really his thing. In fact, a lot of times he doesn't really say all that much. He has always said that a person's favorite topic of conversation is himself. So my dad listens. He has a presence. The same as my grandpa had. When he talks people listen, and when people talk, he listens. It's such a simple thing, but I think it makes people feel like they matter. The thing I love the most about him is not just that, but it's that it is the same regardless of who he is talking to. It could be a drunk in a bar or a rich businessman. Everyone is equal in his eyes. No one is above or below him. I love that about him. I think my older brother Zach has some of these same traits, but with the social personality of my mom mixed in.

I feel very blessed to not only love my parents, but to like and admire them as well. This is a really long post about my family, but I miss them so I thought I'd write about them. I have a lot to say about my recent adventures in Spain, but that will have to wait until next time.

Spring smells like flowers in Spain, and this reminded me of my mom's roses in the backyard at home.